It's Saturday in Athens

It's Saturday in Athens

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Where the falling satellite SHOULD land

Rivalries and trash-talk are one thing that makes college football so wonderful. It can be a fun slap in the face to your hated opponents who are down, or it can be the the hot coffee spilt into your lap when you're already having a bad morning if your team falls short. I (most of the time) try to stay away from it on this blog, and focus on the things I love more than the things I hate..... BUT..... we are faced with a rare opportunity to exhibit our hope for a little help in our hatred of others, courtesy of NASA, circa: 1991

To set up this list, you first need to know that YOU ARE NOT SAFE at the moment. A 6 ton Satellite which has been spinning out of control for the better part of 2 decades is scheduled to come crashing down to earth sometime Friday, or Saturday, or even before.... And we have NO CLUE where the pieces (or the whole thing) will hit.

So why not use this opportunity to voice our desires as to where exactly we wish for this thing to land, and obliterate* the immediate surroundings.  (* and by obliterate, I mean while nobody is physically there, only major structural obliteration)......
Cheerleaders perform for the Georgia Tech crowd at Bobby Dodd
Click to enlarge to see all the fans!!

1. Bobby Dodd Stadium: Atlanta, Georgia
Home of the gnats, a giant piece of the satellite would be doing great justice by demolishing this piece of crap stadium which was recently outdone by Grady High School a couple miles away. Those people hate us, and by golly, we hate them just as much (we are just not as vocal and obsessed over it). How amazing would it be for the "Rambling Wreck" hunk of metal to be parked midfield while the satellite comes screaming down like a comet and destroys the entire lot. It would then be appropriate for the nerds to go play their home games at Grady High, so they can know what it feels like to play in front of a sellout. The atmosphere will also suite the High School level talent they host on a regular basis. And wouldn't it just plain be appropriate and ironic for a fanbase who likes to pretend all their football players go on to work for NASA, to have their stadium annihilated by the wrong-doings of.... NASA.

2. Ben Hill Griffin Stadium: Gainsville, Florida
Even though the Dawgs do not ever play here (ok, except for 1994), it still couldn't have a more appropriate nickname.... "The Swamp". In fact, I consider the entire town of Gainsville to be one giant swamp, minus the beautiful cypress trees, but crawling with people resembling Glenn and Mitchel, the famous brothers on Swamp People. A benefit of getting rid of this should-be condemned piece of land, would mean moving the Gators to their "other home field" in Jacksonville full time, meaning the World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party would have to be moved to the Georgia Dome, or just a home and home like it should be.

3. Jordan-Hare Stadium: Metro Opelika, Alabama
By knocking this stadium into smithereens, the Auburn War-Tiger-Eagle-Plainsmen could officially stop trying to impersonate Sanford Stadium. In the new stadium they would have to build, they can bypass the eerily similar hedges surrounding their field, and perhaps come up with a fight song that doesn't sound so much like Glory, Glory.. also played in Sanford Stadium. The way things have been going on "the plains", perhaps "Jailhouse Rock" or a nice thugged out song by T.I. would be better suited. And while they are at it, don't put in glass which your Tiger-Bird might attempt to fly through.... (too soon?)

Nobody is here, because nobody likes being cooked alive

4. Williams Brice Stadium: Hell, South Carolina
Only because it's too damn hot there. I am pretty sure if we moved this series to Thanksgiving weekend, they would set the kickoff time for noon, and the temperature would still be 113 degrees. May they build their new stadium with a roof and a thermostat. 

5. Neyland Stadium: Knoxville, Tennessee
I really do not hate Neyland Stadium. I just don't like it nearly as much as I used to. All the satellite needs to do, is knock out the eastern side of the grandstands, to re-create the beautiful view of the Tennessee River, which they wanted to cover up for some reason.

6. The Horseshoe: Columbus, Ohio
Mainly just so they can have something else to blame on the SEC.

Leave the cowbells to the pros, MSU
7. Davis Wade Stadium: Starkville, MS
There really is no need to hate this place, but the hope here is that the impact will cause every cowbell within 100 square miles to immediately malfunction beyond repair. Build a new stadium that holds a SEC-like 70 or 80 thousand, and beat a SEC team regularly other than Ole' Miss in order to fill it, so you can stop crying because your fans cannot generate as much noise as the rest of the SEC, trying to justify your bells.

8. Pro-Player/Landshark/Dolphin/Sun Life Stadium: Miami Gardens, Florida
Because it will take nothing short of a falling satellite to take the attention off Nevin Shapiro at "The U"

9. Kyle Field: College Station, Texas & Faurot Field: Columbia, Missouri
By landing on both of these places, it will render Texas A&M and Mi(zz?)ou football-stadium-less, and should automatically disqualify them as suitable additions to the SEC, and we can continue to keep the SOUTHeastern Conference a "Southern thang".

Jesus is actually showing the satellite where to land
10. Notre Dame Stadium: South Bend, Indiana
By falling here, there is a good chance the fans and alumni of the Irish will stop feeling like they have the "luck o' the Irish" on their side.... since they are indeed in Illinois, United States... not in... well... Ireland. And in a related effect, the holier than though attitude might go away since we could just as easily claim that Jesus pointed the satellite at them, as much as they claim Jesus wants them to win on Saturdays.

Your Turn: 
Where would you like to see this rabid satellite land in order to drastically improve the landscape of college football?? 

Friday, September 16, 2011

Isaiah ALREADY better than Knowshon

NO WAY Richt knew how good #24 would be
Knowshon Moreno was a name not too many had heard of at the start of the 2006 season. He literally showed up at UGA's doorstep during his recruitment process, after putting himself on a train from New Jersey to come let the Dawgs know he was interested (true story!). He landed his offer, accepted it without hesitation, and came to the great state of Georgia to play close to some of his family. 

One thing many of the Mark Richt pessimists love to reference is the redshirt which was left on the back of Knowshon Moreno back in 2006. What these pessimists fail to mention, however, is the Dawgs were dealing with one of their deepest RB squads the hedges have ever laid eyes on. Topping that list were already proven Danny Ware and Thomas Brown. And if you know anything about the Dawgs of the aughts, those boys could move the damn football!

So with the depth already at the position, and a season which didn't exactly go the way Dawg fans and coaches would have liked (losses to Vandy, UT mid season), there was very little need to burn the shirt off of Knowshon's back. Nobody had a clue what he would progress into, and there was certainly hope he would be a 3 or 4 year starter beginning in 2007.

I blame NOTHING on Coach Richt for the decision to keep Knowshon on the bench. This is just the way college football works. In fact I don't think Knowshon would have gotten any better by playing in the 2006 season, rather than just competing in practice and gaining multiple Spring Practices before he saw the big field.

And today, the hedges are feasting its eyes on Isaiah Crowell, who has already reminded me of Knowshon... but better!

Expect this a LOT, from #1
Isaiah got more attention during his recruiting process than Knowshon could have ever imagined. Isaiah was on the Dawg's radar long before he took his first unofficial visit. Isaiah played in his first game as a true-freshman. And when I look at Isaiah run the ball, I see what I saw from Knowshon, half way through his red-shirt-freshman season. I have absolutely no doubt that at this point in Isaiah's career, he is better than Knowshon was as a true-freshman.

Then to stop and think, that the bursts of greatness we have already seen from Isaiah have arguably come against the best 2 defenses he will see all season. The skills are already there. And like Knowshon, he will get better in time. We have a VERY special kid in Athens, folks.

While I will never declare ANYBODY the next Herschel, I will gladly go on record to declare Isaiah the next Knowshon. As an always optimistic Dawg fan, I have never been this excited to watch an 0-2 team, and I get giddy thinking about what Isaiah is going to look like come Tennessee, Florida, Auburn, and Georgia Tech.

There is a taste of fall in the air today. And there is a sense of change in Athens right now that goes well beyond the colors in the trees. And the best way to sum it up is from our favorite raspy voice in all the land.... "My God a Freshman!!!!"

less than 24 hours til the next kickoff!!

ps...  I have not had much time to write recently, with school back and session, and as my twitter followers know, my fiance has been in Emory Hospital for the last couple weeks with kidney failures. We feel we are very close to a certain diagnosis, but a long road is ahead for us with treatments and rehabilitation. Thank you guys SO MUCH for outpouring thoughts and prayers sent our way!! She is a Damn Good Dawg, and will fight through this!!